The Whole Enchilada

(This one's for the girls)

My best friend and her husband set me up on a blind date last January. Don't you hate those? This is the second blind date that I have ever been on. Well technically it wasn't a blind date. I met him once at his workplace. It turned out that the guy was her husband's college roomate. As usual my best friend took control of the situation. It's one of the things I love and admire in her most. At least when the control issue is not directed at me.

Surprisingly this double date went extremely well even after my best friend and her husband went and did their own thing. This guy Max and I went to the movies. Why is it that on every "first date" we make the decision to go to the movies? You can't talk there and get to know each other. Maybe that's the point when it's a blind date. I really opened myself up to this. Two of my best friends have meet their husbands on blind dates. I thought maybe I could be another exception to the rule. After the movie we did alot of talking in his truck. We exchanged cell numbers and he asked me back out for the next weekend. After a year of sorting out my feelings for my ex-boyfriend, this prospect was a welcomed diversion. I wasn't using the guy. I really wanted to give him a chance. A fair shake.

We did go out the next weekend. We went to dinner and then went back to my place to watch a DVD. We ended up talking for a couple of hours, but I just wasn't feeling anything. I was disappointed that there seemed to be no fireworks, but then again chemistry can be generated over time.

He decided he had better get back on the road because he had to be at work the next day. He lives about an hour from here. I geared myself up for date number three. The third times a charm. Right? He said that he wanted to take me out again, but he had made plans for the following weekend in advance. I thought as excuses go this was pretty legitimate. This guy at least deserved the benefit of the doubt. He called about the middle of the next week. I could breathe. He was still interested. We chit-chatted for about three hours, but he didn't ask me back out. So I made excuses for him like we all do. Telling myself that the distance thing might be an issue and he was having some financial difficulties. When we start making excuses for them that's when our self-esteem takes a nose dive. I am guilty of doing this many times over. And I know we absolutely refuse to be that symbolic doormat, but until we take a stand they are going to continue to wipe their muddy feet on us. So the story continues.

About the middle of March I decided to make a bold move and invite him to this "innocent" and "friendly" gathering at my best friend's house. I thought we needed to relieve some of the pressure by just hanging out and playing silly board games. He never showed;however, he did call the day before and left me a lame excuse on my voicemail only after I left a message on his voicemail reminding him about our so-called plans. I know. Get a clue.

In my mind the guy needed one more chance. I was applying the three strikes you're out rule for some reason that's beyond me. During one of our phone conversations, he was down and out. He was having a really bad day. I decided to invite him to my place for dinner that Friday night to cheer him up and once and for all see if this thing would go anywhere. I make really good chicken enchiladas. Max had already heard about my enchiladas from James. So Max told me that he would be here the following Friday night for dinner. I went to the grocery store that night and bought the necessary ingredients for this meal, almost a week in advance. We girls like to plan. I had no doubt that he was going to call to confirm plans with me.

He called the Thursday night before he was supposed to come for dinner and said that he had to work offering no apology for putting me out at all. What a jerk! I know that you can sympathize and empathize with me girls. I totally overreacted. I got really upset. He called later that night because he said he was going to. I was cold to him. And I didn't hear from him for about two months after that. When he called two months later, he made idle chit-chat like we were best buds and he hadn't hurt my feelings. I think this guy lost all of his emotional marbles.
The moral of this story is if a guy doesn't like your "Chicken Enchiladas" take them elsewhere because you deserve the whole enchilada. And so do I.